Oh wow! Today's revelations are huge,
much like my currently over-inflated ego. They came to me like most
things do. That is, after experiencing, reacting to or passing
judgment on something/someone and realizing that I'm not, nor will I
ever be perfect myself. And that, while I like myself, I have a few
things to work on. OK, quite a few. And a lot of those things stem
from ego.
Now, those of you who know me well,
likely think of me as very simple and humble. Not exactly someone who
lords it over people or thinks their you know what has no
odor. For the most part, yes, I do try to remember that I'm just a
speck on a tiny planet in an infinitesimal universe among more
infinitesimal universes.
But folks, my ego really does get the
better of me sometimes, just as it does every other human on this
earth. And like every other human being, I have a tendency to think
of my way as the best way of living. And if you don't think we're all
wired this way, at least to a certain degree, just go on Facebook and
spend some time in those comment sections. Do you see it now?
Socializing in general, at least
lately, seems to have an underlying current of proving others wrong,
therefore proving ourselves right. Heck, I can't even go to a
restaurant for a peaceful meal without overhearing conversations of
judgment passed on others or how they live their lives. And the
nauseating thing is, that I see myself slipping into that mode.
Therefore, in order to be at peace with
myself, I have decided to make an effort in recognizing whether it is
my reasoning brain or my diabolical, self-defeating ego that is
running my life and determining my actions. Because, I am not my ego.
And my ego, much like everyone elses, does not have the power to
reason outside of it's own selfish agenda.
My ego likes to tell me that I am right
about everything. That's a problem. But the real issue is that my ego
doesn't seem to be aware that being right is not all that important
in the scheme of things. So, while my identity, or self, if you wish,
is on a path to peace, my ego is constantly running interference. In
my opinion, a superior attitude has no place in a mindful, peaceful
life.
In fact, one can drive oneself
literally nuts by living life according to one's ego and opinions.
And yes, this is my opinion, but honestly, I just feel it's better
for me personally, more peaceful, if you will, to practice
understanding, rather than condemnation, spread joy, rather than
focusing on the negative news of the day, etc.
I find that it's better for me,
psychologically, to practice being humble/kind/considerate and admit
my own faults, rather than exhausting myself by trying to disprove
others or add more air to my ego balloon in an effort to make myself
feel better. Because, you guys, we really are, much as our egos hate
to admit it, quite small in the scheme of things.
And maybe my theory doesn't hold true
for you. That's OK. You do you, as they say. And I am no better than
you for following my own inclinations or feeling the way I do. That's
the whole point. Folks, none of us really knows how to do life. We're
all just winging it and hoping for the best. No point getting a
swelled head over our triumphs or kicking people when they're down.
So, it seems I have discovered another
huge step to conquer on the peace path. Better break out those
walking sticks. This one's a doozy.
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